The Obsessive Mind of a Former Fitness Instructor (and Three Tips) 

I’m nothing if not self-aware. Let me say that up front. I am, admittedly, a bit of a perfectionist. A bit (maybe more than a bit) of a control freak. And I can be judgmental. That said, I justify it all when I think I’m right about something. And of course, I’m here to tell you that I’m right about this: that half the people working out are going to get injured, or at the very least, get very little benefit out of their workouts because they are doing them all wrong.

Yes, there’s the judgmental part but hear me out.

I have been taking Pilates reformer classes now for nearly ten years. For the chronic wear-and-tear issues I developed through 20 years of taking and teaching aerobics classes, Pilates is my physical therapy. The first few years, every class was like an awesome mind-body experience. I got a great workout, felt stronger and more flexible, but also gained a clearer mind and a better attitude – all of the positive benefits we know come from regular exercise. I often take Pilates classes at lunchtime – the perfect break from work which involves a lot of sitting at my desk and constant Zoom meetings (even pre-pandemic – I’ve worked from home for 28 years).

But lately, I’ve been leaving class annoyed. The studio I belong to has some great instructors – if you know what you’re doing. But so many people in their classes don’t know what they’re doing and I’ve witnessed an increasingly laissez-faire attitude amongst the instructors. They’ll give an instruction but won’t correct when they see egregious errors. Their cues are easy to follow for those of us who know and can pace ourselves, but they rarely go the extra mile to ensure all participants follow them – or even suggest that a beginner might need to take a beginning class rather than an advanced one. 

It. Has. Been. Driving. Me. Crazy. 

Yes, part of it is my desire to control. Part of it is the fact that I dearly miss teaching and sometimes (often) think to myself, I could do this better! It’s how I started teaching aerobics back in the ‘80s, after all – while taking classes, it occurred to me that I could do that! And although I already had a full-time career, I took teaching fitness classes seriously. I studied and got certified which involved both a written test to prove I had a basic understanding of exercise physiology, and a practical test that demonstrated I could create and lead a class. I taught at reputable gyms and studios. I had mentors. I spent time crafting fun but safe routines and picking music that I liked and thought others would enjoy.

So I’ve arrived home from Pilates class these days more than once, ranting to my husband.

These people are going to hurt themselves!

The instructors aren’t correcting them!

They’re going so fast and no one has proper form!

My husband has responded by nodding patiently, but basically telling me to focus on my own workout (good advice – the thing I’ve been telling myself – but impossible for my obsessive mind to do). 

There’s also the argument that “well, at least they are exercising” and absolutely – given how many couch potatoes never get that far, and all of the issues our country has with obesity, heart disease, and a myriad of other health issues that can be ascribed to a lack of movement, I certainly give anyone some credit for getting themselves up and to the gym or out the door and moving their body. But…I can’t help thinking, all that effort and you’re still not going to try to do it right?

So I turn to writing these three tips, mostly to vent and perhaps, to impart some words of wisdom to those who may be avid exercisers who have never thought about this much, or beginners who could use some guidance. Most of all, I write this for my own peace of mind if I’m being honest, and because otherwise, I am going to continue obsessing to the detriment of my own workout. 

  1. Faster is NOT better. There is nothing worse than starting your Pilates class with some nice, controlled, muscle-warming foot work with proper breathing, only to have the person next to you flailing back and forth at top speed like they’re on a trampoline. The “faster is not better” edict goes for nearly every form of exercise from the aerobics and jazzercise of old to Pilates to yoga to weight lifting to whatever form of group exercise class you’re taking. When you do a movement quickly, your body uses momentum. The more momentum, the less you engage the muscles to do the work and the more likely you are to do the movement incorrectly. When you’re doing a movement incorrectly, you are not only unlikely to achieve the desired benefits, you’re more likely to injure yourself. It’s something I wish every gym and studio would literally have plastered across their walls: Slow Down! One excellent Pilates instructor I had would always say “Slow and Controlled, Smooth and Precise”. It should be everyone’s mantra.
  • Form is everything. Without proper form, as noted above, you’re not only unlikely to achieve the benefits of a specific movement or exercise, you’re also more likely to injure yourself. One of my mentors used to tell her class “Better to do a few of these properly than a ton of them improperly”. We’d still have those people in class – you know them (and hopefully are not one of them) – that no matter what, they have to complete the full set of 20 reps even if they’ve already exhausted the muscle they’re working and should have stopped at 10. Let’s take a simple abdominal crunch. That person who is red in the face, yanking on their neck, lifting their lower back off the ground, recruiting their legs to help them lift, but finishes the full set of crunches is not hard core and in fact, they’re not even working their abdominals much. In fact, once the abdominals tire, it’s the lower back that often gets recruited to help and that can lead to injury. Fewer reps with proper form is the way to go.
  • Be honest with yourself. There was a beautiful young woman next to me in our intermediate class the other day. Because, as I’ve explained, I’m obsessive, I couldn’t help but notice how her workout was going while conducting mine. She couldn’t finish the series of planks we did – which is totally ok! She also struggled on our squat series – again, totally ok! What I didn’t think was ok is that after class, she told our instructor, “I think I need a harder class”. Look, I’m all for challenging yourself, but if you’re not able to complete the exercises properly in an intermediate class, moving yourself up to an advanced level is going to be detrimental to your progress. Yes, you can modify in any class. But I would also argue that you can make any class – and any movement, in fact – harder and more challenging. I could go to a beginner class (and sometimes do to accommodate my work schedule and some chronic injury issues that have to be catered to) and still make it incredibly challenging by focusing on the movement and my form, maybe adding a spring to the reformer or grabbing some hand weights. I mean, I wish I could do everything I did at the age of 20 without risk of injury or massive amounts of recovery time, but that’s not my reality and I’m ok with it. Whatever your level of fitness, be honest with yourself, be ok with it, and challenge yourself to do more after (and only after) you’ve mastered your current level.

I’m off to Pilates class now. I’ll try to suppress the former fitness instructor inside of me but you can bet there will be a moment where I look to my right or left and have to grit my teeth, close my eyes, and tell myself to focus on – and enjoy – my own workout. 

New Year’s Resolution: Be Kind to Yourself

Photo by Oleksandr Pidvalnyi on Pexels.com

One of my daughter’s asked me last night, while we celebrated the arrival of a new year together, if I had any New Year’s resolutions. I generally avoid resolutions; my view is that if you truly want or need to make a change in your life, you can do so anytime, and those I know who continually make a new list each January, seem to give up on their commitments a few months in. But I did have an experience a few weeks ago that made me think about an important pledge that I should make to myself.

I was finishing up a Pilates class and a friend and fellow Pilates enthusiast was just arriving for her class. At my studio, there are different class levels with a level 1 being the easiest, a 1.5 being the level that most regulars attend, and a level 2 for true masters of pilates. I’ve primarily taken 1.5 classes the past few years as they offer the challenge I need and fit into my work schedule best but lately, I’d been taking more level 1 classes due to a nagging SI joint injury.

My friend greeted me and asked what class I had just finished.

“Oh, just a level one,” I noted.

“Why did you say ‘just’?” she asked. “We need to stop judging ourselves so harshly,” she continued. “It’s my New Year’s resolution.”

I’ve been thinking about what she said ever since. As someone who taught aerobics classes for 20+ years, I’ve always been competitive about my workouts and hard on myself when it comes to exercise. While age and chronic injuries have forced me to slow down to some extent over the years, I suppose I’ve never really accepted the adjustments I’ve had to make.

Similarly, those who have worked with me over the years know that I’m the same way on the job. I expect a lot of others but hold myself to an even higher standard. I have a hard time accepting that I can’t “do it all” and when I fall short of my goals, I’m generally not a happy camper.

But I know that to be happier – at work, at home, and at the gym – it’s imperative that I start being a bit kinder to myself. I’ll never not have high expectations but this year, I’m resolving to accept that I won’t always meet those expectations. I’m going to try, at least.

When I think back to that day and that particular Pilates class, the workout I had that day was actually exactly what I needed. While it wasn’t “hard”, it was “hard enough”, and I remember feeling really great after the class was over until my friend asked me about it. I’ve been replaying the scene to determine how I might have better responded to her question instead of making excuses, beating myself up, and expecting more.

When I get back to the Pilates studio in a few days, after a wonderful holiday vacation, I plan to ease back in with a level 1 class and see how it feels. And if it feels good, if it’s what I need, I’m going to reflect on that, feel accomplished, and move on with my kinder, gentler attitude.

Wishing you all a wonderful 2023 and I hope you will be kinder to yourself – and others – in the New Year!